Greetings Mr. Skull, You Get Right Under My Skin
"It's not who you are - it's what you do that defines the kind of person you are." I have been hearing variations of this ever since the film Batman Begins (click link to read my friend's review of the film) was released. Actions do speak louder than words and those words have been getting under my skin. I'll be 36 this year and I am not happy where I am at in any respect.
Emotionally, professionally and spiritually I am so very far from where I thought I would be in life. But it isn't that I am so far away from my expectations, it is that I feel as though progress has been arrested and maybe even regressed. The span of time is nothing. When I was 25 turning 26, the five years that had passed seemed so very long. Time seems to go by at an incredible rate and yet Look back on 33 years of memories and it all seems so close to me. It's like having hands full of sand, trying to keep its slipping out to a trickle, but soon you have so little left. Tomorrow I am 40 and by the end of next week 65 going on 66 - so what do I have to show for myself? Nothing.
I do nothing worthwhile, ergo I am nothing/no one worthwhile. Time is flying by and I have a real sense of my mortality. The more I try to move somewhere the more resistance I meet. It is absurd.
Bah... don't mind me. I am frustrated about not being back at school working towards my teaching certificate. Frustrated that I have no money to pursue painting. I'll be fine someday, I promise.
BTW, the sketch is mine although the skull is not.
CD's in Play: Fugazi, The Argument. Can, Can Box Music (Live 1971-77)
posted by Magnus at 01:43
24 Comments:
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You turn 40 tomorrow? :) wow-happy birthday my friend.
(Just kidding, you can kick me next time you see me!)
It is strange how time just flies by without you really noticing isn't it?
Let me say this: Never think that you're not doing something. There are lulls and dull points in life, but there really is always someone or something that you are effecting in some way, whether you realise it or not. There are people who need you and take your presence and words to heart and although it can be discouraging sometimes, things change, as they always do and eventually they have to change for the better.
I know I sound like a chirpy optimist but life's put me through enough crap for me to know that things are always changing and there's times of good and utter bad and all manner of in between. I just try to enjoy the good when I get it and remember the good when the suckiness invades...and hope it doesn't stay too long.
Wishing you a better day my friend.
Just showing up to show you I'm here.
I've tried responding about three times, and I vacillate between wanting to bitch-slap you (as one of the most rawly talented people I know, it hurts me to see you sit and navel gaze and squander that talent...the rest of the world is so much more interesting. Even if you go gaze at some other people's navels. Preferably female navels.) and sympathize, cuz I keep falling into this place, too. But I can't really say anything that I haven't already said to your face.
So I'll just say hey. How's it hanging?
I'll say "Hi" and add to the Hoy House social club atmosphere around here. :)
Somehow, I don't think I knew that you wanted to be a teacher. Maybe I did, and I forgot. Must be getting senile in my old age. ;)
helloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
i think this blog sucks and it should not be alive sos and beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep hello dude and i dont care :( :)
i poop alot alot alot alot alot alot and oh ya alot toodles beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep
helloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
toodles again
i live in Ohio and i live in Montana and i live in Japan so were do i live?
remember that one time when i was on that billboard yelling at random cars driving past flashing them and one of them said hey you up there were did your leg go and shut up and i yelled back it fell off my penis when i was running over to hug you and he said oh no you didn't
i was just kidding he didnt say shut up he really said your boobs are huge is that were your foot went
one day when i was living by my self in a small town in the rural texas some guy came up and said you look hot. i then said please im way hotter then youll ever know and he said yes you are and i said i know thats what i just said and then he pulled down his pants and yelled i just farted. I then ran away.
im five years old and the hottest f-ing thing youll ever see. Sick thoughts are running through your head now :)
my sister is a bitch and she sucks ass she lies and is the rudest thing in the world if you want to die meat her you will die within ten seccends unless your me which sucks damb
hey Bee hows life?
life sucks Dan Kat died yesterday, got hit by a car
that sucks she was a great gal
tell me about it she lended me 50 thousand bucks just so i can keep my houseshe lost her electricity because of that
you going to her funeral Bee?
no to painful Dan i really miss you remember when we had that all girls slumberparty and all the guys crashed it?
ya that was the first time i hade a foursome with you Kat and Teeg
first time i realized i was a lesbian and that i loved you
i know me too we really had a great Romance blooming there i really miss all those times i snuck over to your house to have sex
best sex ive ever had in my life g2g bye
i love you call me
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